Talking About Sex in Couples Therapy—Do You Have To?

by Sep 18, 2023

For many people, talking about sex can be a sensitive topic. During middle school, everyone had to learn about the bodily changes and where babies came from during Sex Education. And even then, snickers, laughter, and whispers could be heard around the room.

As we entered adolescence and adulthood, sex became a taboo topic of conversation. For the most part, that portion of your life has remained to be safe, secure, and intimate. Plus, the only person who should actually have a care or say about your sex life besides yourself is your partner—right?

But who are you supposed to turn to when your sex life isn’t exactly going as planned? Let’s learn more about couples therapy and if you actually have to talk about your sex life during it.

First Things First: Do You Have to Talk About Sex During Couples Therapy?

No matter what your reasoning is for attending therapy, what you choose to talk about with your therapist is completely up to you. Your therapist won’t push you to talk about certain areas of your life if you don’t feel comfortable doing so.

Even if the reason you’re attending therapy is related to sex. It doesn’t necessarily mean you have to talk about all of the details associated with your sex life. That being said, talking about your sex life can be extremely beneficial for you, your partner, and your sex life together. Let’s learn more about why talking about sex during couples therapy can help you more than avoiding the topic of conversation.

The Benefits of Talking About Sex During Couples Therapy

While you don’t have to talk about sex to your therapist, it can be extremely beneficial for yourself, your partner, and your relationship. The topic of conversation can also rely heavily on your reasons for attending couples therapy in the first place. Let’s dive into some of the benefits of discussing sex during couples therapy.

It Helps You Work Through Relationship Issues

Discussing your sex life with your therapist may help you work through some underlying relationship problems. Your sex life is affected by a lot of different areas of your and your partner’s lives. Each of your careers, interests, hobbies, and pre-existing relationships can affect the person you are and how you show up in your relationship. As you work through any relationship issues, your sex life will naturally show an improvement as well.

It Helps You Confront Unhappiness or Unsatisfaction

If you’re unhappy or feeling unsatisfied with your sex life, you may want support, especially from an outside third party. A sex therapist will be able to help you and your partner get on the same page again. They’ll be able to provide a safe, secure, and judgment-free environment for you and your partner to express your thoughts and feelings with one another. A therapist will be able to help address any lingering issues or communicate any wants or needs.

It Helps With Learning How to Reach Orgasm

Talking about sex during couples therapy could be a great outlet for someone who has never experienced an orgasm or who has difficulty achieving orgasm on a regular basis. If that’s a bother or concern for you or your partner, a sex therapist will be able to help. They’ll be able to provide more insight into helping you learn how to go deeper and get you there together. You’ll work on communication and mindfulness to help you stay present.

Next Steps

There’s nothing wrong with being curious about couples therapy or wanting to talk about your sex life to an outside third party. Couples therapy has many different benefits. We’re here to help when you’re ready. Reach out to us today to set up an appointment.

Click here for more information on couples therapy.